gossipy gossip rumors

-school citizens are demanding a recount after the election of Paul "Republican" Modeen as homecoming king.
in our humble opinion, maybe a king would get things done better than a president.
-did you hear that (insert: EVERY GIRL IN THE SCHOOL) dies her hair? Oh, my God, i can't believe it.
-bussing from the high school to the co-op may be changed to hovercrafts in order to waste government funds more appropriately, and to better endanger pedestrians. No word as of yet on the space shuttle counterpart for long trips.
-did you know that all of the green house chairs are green... except the minority ones that the other chairs pretend dont exist.
-statistics show that blondes have a fifty percent higher chance of being stupid, and that stupid people have a fifty percent higher chance of making up statistics.